My husband, Brian, and Clark (1 week old)

My husband, Mr. Bottlesoup and Monster (1 week old)

BOTTLESOUP is an alternative to the average, cupcake-puked-on-your-computer-screen mommy blog. Author Mrs. Bottlesoup is (kind of) a mommy blogger. Except she won’t shame you into cloth diapering, wage war against the evil epidural, or whip her boobs out in public. Mrs. Bottlesoup does not own a McMansion or drive an SUV. She has grieved and come to terms with the fact that her children will never attend a nursery school in Manhattan, thus ruining all chances they never really had of getting into Harvard. Mrs. Bottlesoup lives in a tiny apartment with her husband, two littles, and a collection of rare books. She rarely follows “the rules” of parenting. Despite her rebellious attitude toward the army of breastfeeding nazis, she manages to have two healthy babies and a happy marriage. Because being a mom can be enjoyable (even if you’re not the ignorant, paranoid type). But, that’s our little secret.

I decided to start my own “mommy blog” after reading many that were just…lame. Or all the same. And still lame. There’s a lot of mommy-geared literature on the web that targets what I like to call the “dumb housewife demographic”. To clarify, not all housewives are dumb. There are a lot of us, like me, who are college-educated, career-oriented individuals who found ourselves in the wild world of parenting. If you’re like me, you’ve probably also found the mommy blogosphere to be a little less than sophisticated. Most mommy blogs look like a cupcake took too many antidepressants. I don’t know how that’s even possible, but it’s the truth.

Instead of complaining about how much I despise the average mommy blog and mommy blogger, I decided to fill the void and create BOTTLESOUP. This blog is different from other “mommy blogs” in that I’m taking an open, honest approach to my writing. Some of these posts will be vulnerable. Most of my posts won’t make me look perfect. But, this is the first time I’m doing this mom thing. I can’t know everything, I won’t pretend that I do, but I will passionately defend my opinions.

My husband deserves credit for the name “BOTTLESOUP”. I asked him one morning, as he sterilized all the bottles, nipples, and pump parts, “What are you doing?” He said, “Making bottle soup.” I don’t know if other people use that term, but, of course, I Googled it, and it seemed original enough. Thus, BOTTLESOUP was born.

But enough with the introduction. Let’s get to my mommy credentials.

My son, affectionately known as Monster, was born in July 2013. He was 5 days late, and he weighed 8 pounds, 6 ounces. And, no, not “ouch”. It’s called an epidural. And if you have access to one, you are a nutcase not to take advantage of this miracle needle.

I was induced after passing my due date, and the process took about 36 hours (boring). I’d like to give you some romanticized narrative about the first time I held my son, but, instead, I’ll be honest. My husband handed Monster to me, Monster started peeing all over me, and I vomited in a puke pail. See? Everything you never dreamed of became my reality.

But that was okay. I never envisioned my life with children to be ordinary or picture-perfect. And Monster was down with that mentality.

Since Monster was born, we’ve added another little munchkin to the mix. Squish (a baby girl) was born in February 2015. Having two under two has its challenges, but the honest truth: I look forward to waking up with their smiling faces every day. Being their mom doesn’t feel like a “job”; it feels like home…comfortable, snuggly, safe, and warm.

So, BOTTLESOUP is about my life as a laid-back mom, wife, and writer. But don’t let that fool you: my posts are full of feist and anything but boring. I hope you enjoy every adventure.

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